Saturday, March 29, 2008
Thanksgiving & Prayer Request(s)
I want to thank God for...
I am really glad that I could spend three months in a christian environment,where I can afford to set aside time to do daily devotions.And that's so called 'part of the job' too.Ain't it cool? And I suppose,the whole system's different as well.The secular world is result oriented,but I've been exposed to an environment that seeks to affirm all the individuals.Where we are treated as real human beings,instead of some freakazoid that produces maximum results;another slab of flesh. And though it works great,I'm forced to admit that the real world just doesn't work that way.I want to thank Him,for the people I've been in contact with,for the people I got to know,during the past three months.Though everything good will eventually end,I am greatful to have a chance to experience even the most fleeting moment of joy. I thank Him that although there were many times where I felt that the situations were above me,out of my control,He still planted different people at different points of my life,who helped me grow,and truly wanted the best for me.As well as those who were there to listen to my rants,and did not laugh at me in my moments of weaknesses.
Prayer Request
I hope to be able to make it to church on a constant basis.
I hope to continue serving in Ljoy.
I want to learn how to be in the world,yet not of the world.
I need to have more patience in dealing with my parents.
I need to resolve the issue I have with my dad,ASAP.Though I just want to be an escapist.
Please let me have the self discipline to continue in my daily devotion.
I pray for the children,in general,that they will be able to overcome satan and his 'tricks',and be part of the legion of God's angels.
I pray also for the people I've met in SERVE and in church,that God's hand would be upon them,that they can find favor with Him.And that He will continue to bless them,so that they can be blessings to others as well.
I hope to apply what I've learnt in SERVE.
I've realized that the closer my walk with Him,the more judgemental the people around me seem to be.Help me to be able to rise through it all,with my head held high,and faith intact.
She was loved. 9:31 PM
Friday, March 28, 2008
So You Would Come
Before the world began
You were on His mind
And every tear you cry
Is precious in His eyes
Because of His great love
He gave His only Son
Everything was done
So you would come
Nothing you can do
Could make Him love you more
And nothing you have done
Could make Him close the door
Because of His great love
He gave His only Son
Everything was done
So you would come
Come to the Father
Though your gift is small
Broken hearts,broken lives
He will take them all
The power of the Word
The power of His blood
Everything was done
So you would come
I love this song (: Like seriously.I first saw the lyrics yesterday,and wanted to cry.It's just SO touching. But I didn't,'cause I was in the office and it woulda been weird. :X
But isn't it amazing?That though we can't do anything to make Him love us more,yet once we dedicate our lives to His cause,there's nothing we've done that would make Him love us any less,let alone give up on us? (: I mean,how many people can we name with ultimate confidence that we know that can love us in spite of our flaws,and pasts? To be honest,don't we often try our best to hide our past,and 'let bygones be bygones'?Why do we do that?Because we are afraid,that once others know,they'll judge and critisize.Is that not so?
But rest assured,'cause so long as we take Christ as our personal savior,we will be loved.
She was loved. 6:05 PM
Monday, March 24, 2008
|Break me|
Yesterday was resurrection Sunday.It was something new,cause I found out that it's not Easter! Easter is actually a pagan worship event! 0_O But yeah,we get choco eggs on that day,to signify new life.SO, NO Easter Bunny~
Oh wells.
Is it a surprise?I learnt something from the kids in Ljoy,again. (:
They love abundantly,without restraint.They have love for EVERYONE.
No kidding.
I mean,I was observing while they were eating,playing & such.
The kids from different cultural backgrounds,they bond so effortlessly.It's not like it's racial harmony or something,but the kids,they make it a point to include everyone else. (: It's a great thing to take note of, cause people my age (and maybe older),they get bogged down by the simplest things,and usually tend to mix with the people whom we define as 'the same'. But the kids,they move on so fast!Like,they quarrel,but the next minute they'll fight to sit next to each other,and laugh & talk. AMAZING KIDS. I'll miss them loads. ):
I'll pray for you,while you're away,
Each night and day,I'll pray for you.
I'll pray for you,till troubles cease,
Then you and I will live in peace.
She was loved. 8:31 AM
Saturday, March 22, 2008
2nd Testimony. (:
Cause IMO,testimonies should never,and can never,never end. :D
Anyway,this is the post-serve testimony.
Now that I've come to reflect about it,I think I truly thank God for pushing me to follow in His way.Well,just in case anyone gets the wrong idea,His push does not equate to the -pushpushSHOVE- Being the ever loving and merciful God he is,His 'push' is more like "Hey,this is a suggestion,follow this and work out your own solution. Are you game?" Indeed.And game I was so not,in the beginning.Why?
Cause even though I had really really wanted to go to church on Sundays,and part of SERVE meant that I have to go to church on Sundays,I gradually came to realize that all my favorite cartoon slots are on SUNDAYS! So I was like,oh man!can finally go to CHURCH!But cartoons? ): Yepp.So I guess I learnt what sacrifice meant early on in the journey with Him.(Ok,at this point,some might be like wth?What kind of sacrifice do you call that?!) But can I remind you guys,
I've also come to thank God,sincerely,for the people I've been blessed to have come across during the past two months or so;through them I've learnt SO much. (: Like,I always had a very negative mindset,so I always thought 'nobody likes me,they don't care if I died,much less hurt myself.' Especially so,during SERVE.I mean, sure,there were people who were concerned,some disgusted,I suppose,when they came to know that I do hurt myself for kicks.But it was those whom were concerned,that I questioned.I was like 'Is it genuine,or do they just want others to know they care?What will they gain from it?Why do they give a damn?' I'm sorry for thinking that way,but it's just the way I am ): And well,I suppose I'd be lying if I said I don't think that way anymore,but it's to a much smaller extent that I think this way,now.I just met someone yesterday,who showed me it wasn't.
Times when I want to give up,that's when I look to you most.
I want an answer.
I am really thinking that I should be more patient.Like who knows,maybe if I were,that auntie would have been more willing to share with me what happened.I cannot promise I'd be able to really help her,but I really could have provided her with a listening ear.I learnt that,most people just need others to listen to,rather than talk to,them.
And I wouldn't say that there has been a major transformation within me,but to a certain extent,I know I've been changed.I no longer just blame my parents for every argument we have.I guess,I realize I need to be less prideful.I mean,so what if I am?They're more than likely to be too.They are humans too.It's truly tempting to just say,THEY are my parents,they should teach through examples.BUT I have to remember that neither are Christians.But it's not to say that just cause they aren't Christians,they have nothing for me to look up to them for.Like the fact that they stayed married for 18 years,it's amazing! My own relationship only lasted 1 year and 10 months ): And yeah,though they didn't really like me getting into a relationship then,they still were kinda there for me when it was gone.And my dad paid for my education through the years,and my mum gave me my pocket money.And well,they brought me up.
Now,if only I can bring myself to say it to them.It'd be an epic blockbuster.
She was loved. 6:29 PM
Thursday, March 20, 2008
Aftermath. (:
I think the service was alright.Got rather confused,cause the schedule was somewhat changed at the last moment.But thank God,there was no screw up.I was really like really scared while I stood at the side waiting for my turn.So I prayed. :D Thank goodness,cos just as I read the last word,the last feet washer finished washing the feet and walked past me.I was like,OH PRAISE THE LORD~ Cause I started off reading too fast.
Kinda funny,as I think back to the series of events that occurred.Whilst I was standing at the side waiting for my turn,Ps Chee Seng was like, 'Violet's reading too fast,so maybe you'll have to read even slower.' I was like 0_0! heh.Then just as I read the first sentence,I saw Ps Bertram sort of like half wave half flap his hands, so I tried to slow my pace even more.hahas.It is,and let it remain so,for Your glory.
After the service,I was rather shocked when the people came up to thank us for reading,even the pastors and Rev Barry! 0_0! The people even said that we read well!I was like,me?read well?HAHAHA. :X But thanks :D
Then after that,I went to the bus stop opp Smss with Violet,and took 165.But either due to my night blindness
Gotta reach SJC by 9am for Good Friday service tmr. :)
[Please,everybody who is reading,join in this prayer.For it is said that when two or more are gathered in His name,the prayer would be answered.SO please pleasePLEASE join in.]
Dear Lord,
Today at the canteen,I saw an old lady whom I recognized to be working in the school.I think she's a cleaner.
She's quite old,and I feel for her.She looked so sad today,and she was crying.I tried to talk to her,and maybe I wasn't patient enough,but she did not want to speak to me.Please remove whatever pain/hurt/sorrows that she may have kept in her heart.Lord,please show her your love,be it through others,or in your own way. Show her that she can find rest in you oh Lord,and place your comforting hand upon her.Please plant people whom she can talk to,in her life,that she may not be so burdened.
In Jesus name I pray,Amen.
Your everlasting mercy;it's incomprehensible.
Just lead and guide us,that we may be saved,through faith and good works.
She was loved. 10:35 PM
Maundy Thursday.
Which means,simply put',I'll be on the pulpit.tonight.
Wheeees~ I am now using Ps Rachel's lappie,till she needs it.muahahs.
I suppose it doesn't help that I'm already breaking out in bouts of cold sweat,no kidding.
For the first time in my life,I'll be up,ON THE PULPIT! Ahhhhh~ [frets]
Lord,help calm the whirlwind within me,give me the courage to proudly proclaim your word.
Jehovah Shammah;
The Lord with us.
IMPO,this is Jesus's most significant portrayal of love towards his disciples.And according to the Word,we should follow and serve our fellow brothers and sisters.[Mark 10:45]
Hello SERVErs,[esp 13-Ds!] does this verse sound familiar? (:
Are you? (:
&This just about sums up everything. :D Thank you Jesus~
She was loved. 12:21 PM
Monday, March 17, 2008
A lesson learnt
So I became momentarily 自闭,and went to sit by myself in a corner in the canteen,after service.Cause barely after I started eating,De Qi came and talked for awhile,and Nat and another guy
Yet,maybe I wasn't meant to be alone,even though I wanted to be.I guess He had other plans.Cause then I saw Amanda (Sim) and chatted with her for a
Second lesson I learnt [during Ljoy],was when I 自闭 again,and went to peace room to read the picture Bible whilst the kidos were watching vcd in agape room.Nat was gonna go over so he asked me to too.Well he seemed appalled when I told him why I don't want to go next door. But he
But when I went over,He once again showed that He knows best what I should do.My heart just melted when I saw them.I almost couldn't control myself and my emotions,I nearly cried.Cause they are so innocent,and so pure.So trusting,and so adorable.Jonson&Angela,I'll miss you both..
Through this I've learnt,that we each have a responsibility;To train and nuture the young in our charge.
And maybe now I'll learn to focus my attention on the Bible,which I've really neglected.
Lord forgive me.
She was loved. 6:33 PM
Saturday, March 15, 2008
Questions.
Why is it so hard to tell the truth
Yet so easy to tell a lie?
Why are we so sleepy in church but
Right when the sermon is over we suddenly wake up?
Why is it so hard to talk about God
yet so easy to talk about nasty stuff?
Why is it so boring to look at a Christian magazine,
yet so easy to look at a nasty one?
Why is it so easy to delete a Godly e-mail,
yet we forward all of the nasty ones?
Why are the churches getting smaller
yet the bars and dance clubs are getting larger?
Indeed.Can someone come up with the answers [albeit the non-cliched ones,] and enlighten me?
Picked up a few books for reading. (: Boy,will I ever be so occupied.You can't accuse me of slacking now :D It's christian books,of course.And I'll be posting excerpts of what I read in my posts,when I get to post.Just a rough idea on what I am reading;
1)Being a woman of God [Ginger Gabriel]
2)Understanding the Bible [John Scott]
3)Relationships [Dean Sherman]
4)You too can change the world [Daphne Spraggett & Jill Johnstone]
The first two books were borrowed from Ps Rachel,who said I could take as long as I want to read the books, as long as I return them.Awrights.I have to agree,John Scott is quite a decent writer.However,IMO, Dean Sherman is just SO much better (: The last book's pretty cool,it's actually a prayer book.No kidding.I love love love it~ It's got background info on different countries,and short prayers for the people of each countries (:
I'd have to agree with Ps Bertram,that,whether or not the SERVE programme was successful,depends on how we live our lives after the programme has ended.Cause during the programme,everything was sort of all prepared for us.And,hmmmm.Eveangelism is through the way we live our lives,through action and speech,not just preaching.They go hand in hand. (:
I'll be doing scripture reading on thurs,please pray for me.I hope I won't be too nervous,and screw the whole sevice.I can't afford to do that. Please.
She was loved. 9:26 PM
Thursday, March 13, 2008
Faith.
This is a story that was emailed to me,that I think I should share.It's just SO relatable. (:
The DIFFERENCE between Science and God
'Let me explain the problem science has with Jesus Christ.' The atheistprofessor of philosophy pauses before his class and then asks one of his new students to stand.'You're a Christian, aren't you, son?''Yes sir,' the student says.'So you believe in God?''Absolutely.''Is God good?''Sure! God's good.''Is God all-powerful? Can God do anything?''Yes.''Are you good or evil?''The Bible says I'm evil.'The professor grins knowingly. 'Aha! The Bible!' He considers for amoment.'Here's one for you. Let's say there's a sick person over here and youcan cure him. You can do it. Would you help him? Would you try?''Yes sir, I would.''So you're good...!''I wouldn't say that.''But why not say that? You'd help a sick and maimed person if you could. Most of us would if we could. But God doesn't.'The student does not answer, so the professor continues. 'He doesn't, does he? My brother was a Christian who died of cancer, even though he prayed to Jesus to heal him How is this Jesus good? Hmmm? Canyou answer that one?'The student remains silent.'No, you can't, can you?' the professor says. He takes a sip ofwater from a glass on his desk to give the student time to relax.'Let's start again, young fella Is God good?''Er...yes,' the student says.'Is Satan good?'The student doesn't hesitate on this one. 'No.''Then where does Satan come from?'The student : 'From...God...''That's right. God made Satan, didn't he? Tell me, son. Is there evil in this world?''Yes, sir.''Evil's everywhere, isn't it? And God did make everything,correct?''Yes.''So who created evil?' The professor continued, 'If God created everything, then God created evil, since evil exists, and according to the principle that our works define who we are, then God is evil.'Without allowing the student to answer, the professor continues:'Is there sickness? Immorality? Hatred? Ugliness? All these terrible things, do they exist in this world?'The student: 'Yes.''So who created them?'The student does not answer again, so the professor repeats his question. 'Who created them? There is still no answer. Suddenly the lecturer breaks away to pace in front of the classroom. The class is mesmerized.'Tell me,' he continues onto another student. 'Do you believe inJesus Christ, son?'The student's voice is confident: 'Yes, professor, I do.'The old man stops pacing. 'Science says you have five senses youuse to identify and observe the world around you. Have you ever seenJesus?''No sir. I've never seen Him''Then tell us if you've ever heard your Jesus?''No, sir, I have not.''Have you ever actually felt your Jesus, tasted your Jesus or smelt your Jesus? Have you ever had any sensory perception of Jesus Christ, or God for that matter?''No, sir, I'm afraid I haven't.''Yet you still believe in him?''Yes.''According to the rules of empirical, testable, demonstrable protocol, science says your God doesn't exist. What do you say to that,son?''Nothing,' the student replies. 'I only have my faith.''Yes, faith,' the professor repeats. 'And that is the problem science has with God. There is no evidence, only faith.'The student stands quietly for a moment, before asking aquestion of his own. 'Professor, is there such thing as heat?''Yes,' the professor replies. 'There's heat.''And is there such a thing as cold?''Yes, son, there's cold too.''No sir, there isn't.'The professor turns to face the student, obviously interested.The room suddenly becomes very quiet. The student begins to explain.'You can have lots of heat, even more heat, super-heat,mega-heat, unlimited heat, white heat, a little heat or no heat, but wedon't have anything called 'cold'. We can hit up to 458 degrees belowzero, which is no heat, but we can't go any further after that. There isno such thing as cold; otherwise we would be able to go colder than thelowest -458 degrees. Every body or object is susceptible to study whenit has or transmits energy, and heat is what makes a body or matter have or transmit energy. Absolute zero (-458 F) is the total absence of heat.You see, sir, cold is only a word we use to describe the absence ofheat. We cannot measure cold. Heat we can measure in thermal units because heat is energy. Cold is not the opposite of heat, sir, just theabsence of it.'Silence across the room. A pen drops somewhere in the classroom,sounding like a hammer.'What about darkness, professor. Is there such a thing asdarkness?''Yes,' the professor replies without hesitation. 'What is nightif it isn't darkness?''You're wrong again, sir. Darkness is not something; it is theabsence of something. You can have low light, normal light, brightlight, flashing light, but if you have no light constantly you haveNothing and it's called darkness, isn't it? That's the meaning we use todefine the word. In reality, darkness isn't. If it were, you would be ableto make darkness darker, wouldn't you?'The professor begins to smile at the student in front of him.This will be a good semester. 'So what point are you making, young man?''Yes, professor. My point is, your philosophical premise is flawed to start with, and so your conclusion must also be flawed.'The professor's face cannot hide his surprise this time.'Flawed? Can you explain how?''You are working on the premise of duality,' the studentexplains. 'You argue that there is life and then there's death; a goodGod and a bad God. You are viewing the concept of God as somethingfinite, something we can measure. Sir, science can't even explain athought. It uses electricity and magnetism, but has never seen, much less fully understood either one. To view death as the opposite of lifeis to be ignorant of the fact that death cannot exist as a substantivething. Death is not the opposite of life, just the absence of it.''Now tell me, professor. Do you teach your students that theyevolved from a monkey?''If you are referring to the natural evolutionary process, youngman, yes, of course I do''Have you ever observed evolution with your own eyes, sir?'The professor begins to shake his head, still smiling, as he realizes where the argument is going. A very good semester, indeed.'Since no one has ever observed the process of evolution at workand cannot even prove that this process is an on-going endeavor, are you not teaching your opinion, sir? Are you now not a scientist, but apreacher?'The class is in uproar. The student remains silent until the Commotion has subsided.'To continue the point you were making earlier to the otherstudent, let me give you an example of what I mean.'The student looks around the room. 'Is there anyone in the classwho has ever seen the professor's brain?' The class breaks out intolaughter.'Is there anyone here who has ever heard the professor's brain,felt the professor's brain, touched or smelled the professor's brain? No one appears to have done so. So, according to the established rules of empirical, stable, demonstrable protocol, science says that you have nobrain, with all due respect, sir. So if science says you have no brain,how can we trust your lectures, sir?'Now the room is silent. The professor just stares at thestudent, his face unreadable.Finally, after what seems an eternity, the old man answers. 'Iguess you'll have to take them on faith.''Now, you accept that there is faith, and, in fact, faith exists with life,' the student continues. 'Now, sir, is there such a thing as evil?'Now uncertain, the professor responds, 'Of course, there is. Wesee it everyday. It is in the daily example of man's inhumanity to man.It is in the multitude of crime and violence everywhere in the world.These manifestations are nothing else but evil.'To this the student replied, 'Evil does not exist sir, or atleast it does not exist unto itself. Evil is simply the absence of God.It is just like darkness and cold, a word that man has created to describethe absence of God.God did not create evil. Evil is the result of what happens when man does not have God's love present in his heart. It's like the cold that comes when there is no heat or the darkness that comes when there is no light.'The professor sat down.
To simpilfy things,I think that God most certainly did not create evil,but evil existed because of man's fall. The apple,the apple. ): Yes,God made Satan.He must have known that Satan would revolt against Him,that he [satan] would cause mankind to sin.BUT,because He is a God of mercy and grace,He allowed Satan to have a chance to make his decision.And through the consequences of the fall of man,we are shown the extent of His grace and unconditional love, when He sent Christ to die on the Cross for our sins.What we have to understand,is that in those days,dying on the cross was reserved for the worst criminals of that era. Yet,Christ had done no wrong but was betrayed by his very own disciple,to die on the cross for our sins.So what we have now,is a choice. Will we choose to believe in Christ and follow in His ways?
She was loved. 10:16 PM
Tuesday, March 11, 2008
Favorite Verses[Reasons]. ツ
Reason to do daily devotion:
Acts 6:4
"But we will devote ourselves to prayer
and to the ministry of the Word."
Ok,so it doesn't really link to the TS,but I guess what I wanted to say is that since we are followers of the Word,
We should follow what is written in the Bible,as well as try to live the life of His followers.
Ok,I must warn you guys (who are reading),that my thoughts are rather disoriented now.
So back to the main topic,I guess I can link this to James 4:8a.From what I gathered,it seems to be saying that God will draw close to whoever that draws close to Him.I guess that makes sense,cause relationships are always a two-way thing.Hmmms.
Reason to never be afraid;regardless of situations.
2 Timothy 1:7;Psalm 121:7-8;1 John 5:18.
The first verse tells us that God did not give us a spirit of timidity,but a spirit of power,of love and self-discipline.Therefore we should not be afraid of the outcomes of life,but trust that everything will be fine in the Lord's hands.Isaiah 49:16 reiterates that every situation is within His control.
The second verse reassures that The Lord will keep you from all harm-He will watch over your life;the Lord will watch over your coming and going,both now and forever more.
The third highlights
Choices we make
Can determine the make or break
of personal lives
Including our own.
Reason why we should never believe the lies that we're unworthy.
John 3:16-17 God my creator loves me!
John 15:15 Christ loves me and I'm His friend!
1 Corinthians 6:20 I've been bought with a price;I belong to God!
Ephesians 1:5 I've been adopted as God's child!
Colossians 1:14 I've been redeemed and forgiven of all my sins!
Bottom line is,if my creator loves me and has forgiven all my wrongdoings,who are to to point a finger at me?
And what makes you think you're worthy enough to call me unworthy?
To all who face fears,stress,or just need to fill your void;
Psalm 62:1
My soul finds rest in God alone,my salvation comes from Him. He alone is my rock and salvation.He is my fortress,I'll never be shaken.
She was loved. 10:08 PM
Monday, March 10, 2008
Personal responsibility.
1 Peter 3:15-16 [NIV]
15But in your hearts set apart Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect,
15But in your hearts set apart Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect,
16keeping a clear conscience, so that those who speak maliciously against your good behavior in Christ may be ashamed of their slander.
Basically,what I mean is that,by ourselves,we're like machines without (brains).Kinda like,erm,robots.We go through life with few (limited) emotions,and become self-centered.Thus,when we believe in,and walk with Him,He is our brain,our sight and everything else,that we may be close to what is perfect.close to,because no matter how hard we try,we are still flawed beings.and sure,we have Adam&Eve to thank for that.But that's besides the point.
So when we call ourselves Christians,we mean to tell the world that we are the followers of Christ,His disciples. And so we have to uphold the responsibility of maintaining a good image,that others might want to follow,and be saved.For He is the way,the truth and the light,there is no other way to heaven except through Him alone. Thus in our daily life,we have to make a conscious effort to be mindful of the way we do things,how we handle situations,especially in terms of our speech during times of frustrations. And yes,that means;NO SWEARING or cursing ,even under our breaths.Because,even what others might not hear,you can bet your last dollar that He hears.
The crux of this passage is that;
Even (and especially) if we get persecuted/mocked by others for following in His ways,we should all the more persevere and disregard the rest.
Jesus first,others second,then yourself! (:
She was loved. 3:58 PM
Friday, March 7, 2008
Search Me.
Psalm 139
1O LORD, you have searched me and known me!
2You know when I sit down and when I rise up;
you discern my thoughts from afar.
3You search out my path and my lying down
and are acquainted with all my ways.
4Even before a word is on my tongue,
behold, O LORD, you know it altogether.
5You hem me in, behind and before,
and lay your hand upon me.
6Such knowledge is too wonderful for me;
it is high; I cannot attain it.
7Where shall I go from your Spirit?
Or where shall I flee from your presence?
8If I ascend to heaven, you are there!
If I make my bed in Sheol, you are there!
9If I take the wings of the morning
and dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea,
10even there your hand shall lead me,
and your right hand shall hold me.
11If I say,"Surely the darkness shall cover me,
and the light about me be night,"
12even the darkness is not dark to you;
the night is bright as the day,
for darkness is as light with you.
13For you formed my inward parts;
you knitted me together in my mother's womb.
14I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made.
Wonderful are your works;
my soul knows it very well.
15My frame was not hidden from you,when I was being made in secret,
intricately woven in the depths of the earth.
16Your eyes saw my unformed substance;
in your book were written, every one of them,the days that were formed for me,
when as yet there was none of them.
17How precious to me are your thoughts,O God!
How vast is the sum of them!
18If I would count them, they are more than the sand.
I awake, and I am still with you.
19Oh that you would slay the wicked, O God!
O men of blood,depart from me!
20They speak against you with malicious intent;
your enemies take your name in vain!
21Do I not hate those who hate you, O LORD?
And do I not loathe those who rise up against you?
22I hate them with complete hatred;
I count them my enemies.
23Search me, O God, and know my heart!
Try me and know my thoughts!
24And see if there be any grievous way in me,
and lead me in the way everlasting!
Due to some issues which have cropped up,I was having a HUGE headache.Trying to make some decisions that require lots of thinking,when I just want to run away from it all.Then I saw the link left by Kenneth (last Friday),and guess what?I stumbled upon the verse of the day,which happened to be Psalm 139:23-24. So I was like ok,I'll read the whole chapter,cause then I'll get the whole story.But I took it as just that.I read it,and didn't stop to analyze the meaning behind it.It's as if I was reading a story.Then I talked to Geoffrey about bits and pieces of the problem I'm dealing with,and he offered some advice and such.And during the convo,I said I wasn't trying to run away,I was just trying to hide.Then on sat morning,he told me to read PSALM 139! And I was like OMGSH! I read that last night.So yeah,he told me to re-read it,and this time round,I should try to figure out what it holds.So I did,and this is what I gathered.
I can run,but I can't hide.This is because He already knew what I was gonna do,even before the thought was formulated in my brain.It's not that I didn't already know about that,but it was more like I didn't want to think of it that way.Call it stubborness,human flaw,willfulness,or whatever you want to.I just didn't want to believe that I have a creator who knows the difficulties that are coming my way,and has the power to 1)lessen the impact,or 2)Change the situation completely;BUT CHOOSES NOT TO. Is freewill really the best choice for flawed beings?But I realized also,that He uses our setbacks as a platform for which we can draw closer to Him. Why?And is He sadistic?NO!Because,when we hurt,so does He.But the reason why He lets us carry on,is because He knows,that only in times of trouble/hurt will we seek Him willingly.And that's what He wants,a willing heart.Find the answer in His word,its true.
You'll be strong because he walks with you
By His faithfulness He'll change you too
GOD answers prayers.
She was loved. 8:30 PM
My Testimony.
So anyways,this is my story.
I was brought up in a non - christian family,but in a christian environment.Why?I don't know either.I was sent to a christian kindergarten,and my nanny was a christian.I did stuffs like singing graces before eating,but more for the fun than the meaning it holds.
Then I was sent to a catholic primary school,where I heard alot about Jesus,but never did know Him.I remember the times,where it was some sort of a privilege to be able to walk up to the 'sacred' table during mass sessions and drinking ribena and waffles.Actually,it seemed so because that was the only time we could eat openly in the hall. Other than that,really,I suppose it was the air,chokeful of suspense and excitement,that makes you want to be part of it. But I also remember that at Pri 4,when I actually listened attentively to the Priest during the times he talked,I was kinda freaked out by them.Cause he said,'The blood of Christ keep you in eternal life,the body of Christ keep you in eternal life.' And I was like,eeeeeeeeeew?CANNIBAL.And because I wasn't one who dared ask questions,I just kept myself locked with this perception.
During the early secondary school years,I met with,and was 'betrayed' by many of my christian friends,whom I've held in high regard and trusted.So then my trust was shattered,and I vowed never to become christian.I felt that I HATE people who call themselves christians.I promised myself that I'd NEVER become christian. I'd come to the point where I associated them all as hypocrites-people who don't practice what they preach.Also, my christian cousin would always pick on me,as she knew I could never retaliate.
However,that all changed during the beginning of my sec 4 year,when the previous batch of SERVErs came and took over the chapel timeslot.It was then that I felt inspired to re-learn about the christian faith.I also felt compelled to learn more about the SERVE programme,and to take part in it.
So straight after chapel,I gathered my stuffs,and ran to the canteen where Ps Glenn & Serene were sitting.I asked Ps Serene more about the programme,and how it's run.I felt that hey! I want to join,but it's my O level year,so maybe I'll consider after the exams are over.
I felt heartened that even though I wasn't a christian,and did not attend SJC services,I was still allowed a place to study in the Shalom room.Also,whenever I was feeling down,or discouraged,or just feel like giving up,Ps Serene was always there to talk to me,as well as give advice.She was either there with me,or for me.Actually, I think it's a little of both.
Straight after O levels though,I'd forgotten about the silent promise I made to myself earlier in the year.The first vocation I signed up for was to be a volunteer at the Handicapped Youth's camp.I was rejected,with nary an interview.I was dejected,and upset.I went to the chapel on that day,wanting to find Ps Serene for advice. However,she wasn't there.Instead,I had a talk with Ps Bertram,and was given a flyer about SERVE '08.And that was when it hit me,that I'd forgotten about it.And yes,part of the reason why I signed up,was because there's a chance I might get to work with the handicapped! So I was like WOW! So I signed up for it.
When I first stepped into Shaw Hall,I told myself that I will not trust anyone,I will not talk to anyone,unless they first talked to me,and I will not share too much about myself.That I am above looking for people to connect with.I was posted to The 13th Disciple and though we were the last group to warm up to each other,I NEVER regretted making the decision to join SERVE.And I suppose I was put into this group not by chance,but through His will.Whenever people said stuffs like that in the past,I'd roll my eyes and instantly stop listening.But now I know better.
I'm thankful to be in this group,as they've really helped me to grow alot in my walk with Him.Some of them especially,were there for me when I thought no one would care;when I needed them most,they were there. When I got back my O's results,I was like,OH NO.Will they look down on me?But no.They just gave me words of encouragement,and talked to me like I was a normal person.Whenever I am down or in the mood for self harm, they are always there just in time,like everything was orchestrated.I never got to the point where I can kill myself.Somehow,someone would always message me at the time I felt ready,to convince me that I really wasn't,and that He who loves me feels the hurt when I self harm.
Through the attachment,I learnt to be content with whatever I'm blessed to receive.I learnt also,to appreciate the people around me.People I took for granted,people whom I thought I hated,I'm now on the mend. I learnt to look past perceived differences,and to appreciate people for who they are.As individuals,but one in His kingdom. Big or small,fat or thin,beautiful or ugly,we're all His.We started at the same starting point,but the fininshing lines defer.
The road to righteousness is narrow,but that which leads to evil is wide.
Thank you;
Ps Fu - Man,for allowing me to be part of SERVE though I wasn't in any church prior to the programme.
Ps Serene,for treating me like an adult and for being there when I was almost insane.
Ps Bertram,for treating me like an adult as well,and fielding my bombardment of questions (and at the same time bombarding me with more questions).
Pastors of SJC,for sponsoring me for the programme. (:
She was loved. 7:26 PM
Wednesday, March 5, 2008
Honor.
Sorry,but Amandaz is feeling mighty tired today,so refer to your Bibles (:
Honoring your parents
-> Ten Commandments.
Exodus 20:12;Matthew 15:4;Ephesians 6:2
Alrights,I just want to specifically point out the Ephesians Verse (cos if I remember correctly,the rest are commandments,so I trust that no further explanations are needed?) Ok,about that,I had originally read the whole chapter,and there was this bit about how fathers shouldn't provoke their children to moments of anger, and in some other part of the bible (can't remember exactly where) it says train the child in the way he should go (and so on).. And I was like,omgsh.My father always knows which buttons to push to make me angry.And he'd do it ever so often.But then I realized (with the help of Ps Glenn and Bertram,) that our perspective changes in accordance to how we feel in that circumstance.So yeah.And there's also this part in the Bible which says,whatever measure you use to judge others,the same measure will be used unto you (again,I can't remember the verse.SORRY!).So that scared me a little.and made me reflect somewhat upon my actions.And, is it possible?That because I want my parents to fit into the hero characters (thus 'forgetting' they need rooms for flaws too?),I judge them more than any other adults I come into contact with,making them seem better than my parents?I WILL LEARN THEREFORE,to better appreciate my parents,as a person,and as people I should respect,simply because they brought me to life and raised me up,and not because I think they deserve it,or not.Human judgement varies according to moods.GOD's judgement is fair,and undebatable.Plus my parents are not christians,so I suppose I should allow them more space. Parents are,after all,earthly authorities placed above us.
Honoring GOD
-> Tithe,humility before honor.
Proverbs 3:9;Proverbs 15:33;Romans 13:7
Tithe is a monthly amount that should be set aside for GOD (church,if you so wish.)
It is giving the amount before all the deductions for taxes,food,transport,blah.
It is not the church/GOD trying to rip us off,and in actual fact,WE OWE IT TO GOD.
We have what we have because he first gave us.Amen?AMEN!
SO,in that sense,we are not giving him what we've earned/slogged hard for,we are merely returning a portion to him.Tithe is not just teaching us that principle,but it also teaches us how to set our priorities,and how to set it right.Because,GOD is and should be our top,if not,sole priority in life. (:
DID you know?Our pastors' pay comes from our tithing!Think of the levites (: They have such faith!I was like,what if no one tithe?And my pastor,he said.We have faith in the LORD.WOW. O.o!
My mama was initially against me tithing.This is the usual convo:
Mum:Christian ah!Always must give 10% of the pay to church ah!So expensive to be christians!
Me:You taoist people go temple also donate here donate there,then special rites,GOD's bdaes,ask for 'fus' all also need money mah.Sometimes even more than 10% of your pay what.Even more expensive.
Found out from my pastor it was actually the wrong way to handle it. :X But I suppose it worked,cause she never talked to me about the tithe thingy anymore :D
Done for the day (:
Shall share my personal testimonial tomorrow. :D
So no Bible verses tmr.
She was loved. 8:54 PM
Tuesday, March 4, 2008
Cliche Verses.Part II
For Death;
Psalms 23:1-6
The Lord is my shepherd;I shall not want.
He makes me lie down in green pastures.
He leads me beside still waters.
He restores my soul.
He leads me in paths of righteousness for His name's sake.
Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death,
I will fear no evil,
For you are with me;
Your rod and your staff,
They comfort me.
You prepare a table before me
In the presence of my enemies;
You anoint my head with oil;
My cup overflows.
Surely goodness and mercy
Shall follow me all the days of my life,
And I shall dwell in the house of the LORD forever.
Why for His name's sake?I dont understand.Why did GOD create us to worship Him?My pastor says I'm maturing,but I can't feel it lah ): Anyways,whatever it is,I think the passage reassures us that the GOD we hold in high regard is one who is faithful,merciful and comforting. (:
2 Timothy 4:7
I have fought the good fight,
I have finished the race,
I have kept the faith.
Isn't this phrase wonderful?I think it'd sum up a wonderful life,fitting of that of a matyr.If I'm not wrong,the defination of that is one who sacrifices (his) life for (his) faith.Meaning to say,(he) doesn't succumb to the circumstances,but have faith in the LORD.By the way,faith is not blind belief.That'd be negligience.Faith is knowing the consequences of what is to come,yet at the same time surrendering our all and placing our trust in Him who knows best. (:
For Forgiveness;
Romans 6:23
For the wages of sin is death,
but the free gift of GOD is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.
Matthew 18:21-22
[typing this tmr due to lack of time,sorrys people.check your Bibles! (:]
Forgiveness removes all hatred and brings peace to the heart.It allows space for healing to begin. (:
Due to her incessant naggings,I shall continue the rest tmr,and do the honor bit tmr. REALLY SORRY! TOODLES~
She was loved. 9:14 PM
Monday, March 3, 2008
THE cliche Verses.Part I
Jeremiah 29:11
For I know the plans I have for you,declares the LORD,
plans for wholeness and not for evil,
to give you a future and a hope.
Personally,alot of people have given me this phrase when I was unsure about my results.Like,post O's or something.And yeah,before I collected my results,I was bombarded with this.Why?I don't really know.I suppose though,that people around were trying to tell me that worrying about something never changes its outcome,and what we should do is have faith in the LORD and surrender our all to Him.YES.Even the negative stuffs.Looking back,I suppose it's better than my usual coping mechanism.For others around. (: Yes people,it shouldn't be all about us,but the people around us,their feelings matter too.By rights,it should matter more than our own because everything we do,it affects them as well.
For Love;
John 3:16
For GOD so loved the world,that he gave his only Son,
that whoever believes in him shall not perish,but have eternal life.
1 Corinthians 13:4-7
Love is patient and kind;love does not envy or boast;
It is not arrogant or rude.It does not insist on its own way;
It is not irritable or resentful;it does not rejoice at wrongdoing,
But rejoices in the truth.Love bears all things,believes all things,
Hopes all things,endures all things.
I used to sing John 3:16 as part of Xmas caroles at Snow City. (: Those were the good old days. :D Ahhh.
But -gasp!- I didn't know that it was a Bible verse! whews,it was a BIG shocker.In the good sense. (: As for corinthians,I feel that it was teaching more on the values of Love,and how we should go about loving one another.After all, Exodus 20;Love thy neighbor as thyself. (:
Tmr shall be part II. (:
I'll be doing Forgiveness,and funeral passage. (:
And then a separate post on HONOR(-ing parents.)
I do believe I am learning from these posts,I think I'll use it as my quiet time. (:
YAyness!And I suppose if I must admit,that I am quite happy doing this.
Listening to Reuben Morgan;waiting here.
I LOVE the song (: Thanks Chris! :D
She was loved. 9:59 PM
Lyrics to my fave songs. (:
Ave Maria
As I kneel before you,
As I bow my head in prayer.
Take this day,make it yours,
As I kneel before you,
As I bow my head in prayer.
Take this day,make it yours,
And fill me with your love.
Ave Maria
Gratia plena
Dominus Tecum
Benedicta Tu.
Gratia plena
Dominus Tecum
Benedicta Tu.
Did You Ever Talk To God Above
Did you ever talk to God above?
Tell him that you need a friend to love
Pray in Jesus name believing that
God answers prayers.
Have you told him all your cares and woes
Every tiny little fear he knows
You can know he'll always hear
And He'll answer prayers.
You can whisper in a crowd to him
You can cry when you're alone to Him
You don't have to pray out loud to Him
He knows your thoughts.
On a lofty mountain peak He's there
In a meadow by a stream He's there
Anywhere on Earth you go
He's been there from the start.
Find the answer in His word,its true.
You'll be strong because he walks with you
By His faithfulness He'll change you too
GOD answers prayers.
LORD I Lift Your Name On High
Lord I lift your name on high
Lord I love to sing you praises
I'm so glad you're in my life
I'm so glad you came to save us
You came from heaven to Earth
To show the way
From the Earth to the cross
My debts to pay
From the cross to the grave
From the grave to the sky
Lord I lift your name on high
Lord I lift your name on high
I Hear The Bells
I hear the bells,of Mary Ave's ringing
Joy to my heart,like angel's voices singing.
Calling to prayer,with echos from afar,
Ave Marie,Ave Maria.
Prayer For Peace
Lord, we pray for golden peace
Peace all over the land
May all men dwell in liberty,
Walking hand in hand.
Banish fear and ignorance,
Hunger,thirst and pain.
Banish hate and poverty
Let no man live in vain,
Let no man live in vain.
Here I am Lord
I ,the Lord of sea and sky
I have heard my people cry
All who dwell in dark and sin
My hand will save.
I,who made the stars of night
I'll make their darkness bright
Who'll bear my light to them
Whom shall I send?
Here I am Lord,
Is it I Lord?
I have heard you
Calling in the night
I'll go Lord,if you lead me
I'll hold your people in my heart.
Hail Holy Queen
Hail holy queen enthroned above,O Maria.
Hail queen of mercy and of love,O Maria.
Triumph all ye cherubim
Sing with us ye seraphim
Heaven and Earth resound the hymn
Salve,salve,salve Regina.
In His Time
In His time
In His time
He makes all things beautiful
In His time.
Lord please show me everyday
As you're teaching me your way
That you do just what you say
In Your time.
In Your time
In Your time
You make all things beautiful
In Your time.
Lord my life to you I bring
May each song I have to sing
Be to you a lovely thing
In Your time.
Jesus Loves Me
Jesus loves me,this I know
For the Bible tells me so
Little ones to Him belong
They are weak but He is strong.
Yes,Jesus loves me
Yes,Jesus loves me
Yes,Jesus loves me
The Bible tells me so.
Jesus loves me,He who died
Heaven's gate to open wide
He will wash away my sins
Let His little child come in.
Yes,Jesus loves me
Yes,Jesus loves me
Yes,Jesus loves me
The Bible tells me so.
Yes,Jesus loves me
Yes,Jesus loves me
The Bible tells me so.
Jesus take this heart of mine
Make it pure and wholy thine
Thou hast bled and died for me
I will henceforth live for thee.
Yes,Jesus loves me
Yes,Jesus loves me
Yes,Jesus loves me
The Bible tells me so.
Yes,Jesus loves me
Yes,Jesus loves me
The Bible tells me so.
Mary Is Our Queen
Mary is our queen,O sing to her.
Mary is our mother,trust in her.
Mary is the star that shines at night
Guiding us to Jesus our true light.
Mary is the creature of our race
Whom the Holy Spirit filled with grace
To become the mother of our Lord
The God whom she adored.
What A Friend We Have In Jesus
What a friend we have in Jesus,all our sins and griefs to bear.
What a privilege to carry,everything to God in prayer.
Oh,what peace we often forfeit,oh what needless pain we bear.
All because we do not carry,everything to God in prayer.
Have we trial and temptations,is there trouble anywhere?
We should never be discouraged,take it to the Lord in prayer.
Can we find a friend so faithful,who will all our sorrows share?
Jesus knows our e'vry weakness,take it to the Lord in prayer.
Are we weak and heavy laden?
Cumbered with a load of care?
Precious savior,still our refuge,
take take it to the Lord in prayer.
Do thy friends despise,forsake thee?
Take it to the Lord in prayer.
In His arms He'll take and shield thee,
Thou wilt find a solace there.
Shalom
Shalom my friend,Shalom my friend,
Shalom,shalom
God's peace be with you,God's peace be with you
Shalom,shalom.
Shalom good friends,shalom good friends,
shalom,shalom
Till we meet again,till we meet again
Shalom,shalom.
She was loved. 1:55 PM
Sins;through deliberate faults.
Yes,suicide is just a sin like any other.It is a pardonable sin.
After all,Christ has died for our past,present,and future sins.
However,we must remember that suicide is self murder,and as all christians know,
Murder is sin.
And because we set out to deliberately sin,we are asking not for forgiveness,
but for judgement upon ourselves.
Yepp,it's as simple as that,really. (:
After all,Christ has died for our past,present,and future sins.
However,we must remember that suicide is self murder,and as all christians know,
Murder is sin.
And because we set out to deliberately sin,we are asking not for forgiveness,
but for judgement upon ourselves.
Yepp,it's as simple as that,really. (:
Hebrews 10:26
For if we go on sinning deliberately,after receiving the knowledge of the truth,
there no longer remains a sacrifice for sins.
For if we go on sinning deliberately,after receiving the knowledge of the truth,
there no longer remains a sacrifice for sins.
I suppose it means to say that though Christ died for our sins and he's there to bridge the gap between GOD and us,we'll still be judged for our actions,especially so after we become christians.After all,He has said;
" Not everyone who says to me," Lord,Lord ,"will enter the Kingdom of heaven,but the one who does the will of my Father who is in heaven." Which means to say,GOD doesn't judge us by what we proclaim,but by our actions and speech.
By the way,that was taken from Matthew 7:21. (:
" Not everyone who says to me," Lord,Lord ,"will enter the Kingdom of heaven,but the one who does the will of my Father who is in heaven." Which means to say,GOD doesn't judge us by what we proclaim,but by our actions and speech.
By the way,that was taken from Matthew 7:21. (:
She was loved. 12:53 PM